Mastering the Art of Doing Scary (and Often Hilarious) Shit | with Paul Beckman

Zack Arnold

So Paul, my guess is that as time goes on, if you continue in the direction that you're going, you're going to be known as the next dose Equis men, because you are one of the most fascinating human beings that I think I've ever met. And basically every single crazy, weird, uncomfortable thing that I've done, of which there are very few, because I live a pretty boring life, almost all of them start with the following sentence this one time. Game with Wes and Paul. So where I'd actually like to begin is talk to me about the time you decided you wanted to see the Dodgers at the World Series.

Paul Beckman

Oh, man, okay. Dodgers, the World Series. I moved to LA, I think in like 2016 2017, I was living in Iowa before that for seven years, where I went to college and I stayed there for work at John Deere for another like three and a half years. So I was living in a small town in Ankeny, Iowa, and I always knew I was going to be moving to LA the big city of the big city of Los Angeles, and man World Series, I'm sneaky. I don't know I'm one of my one of my thrill seeking adventures, adventurous things is being sneaky, maybe getting into places that I don't belong. And in my youth, I use it as a means to, I guess, prove my courage. And also growing up going to a lot of theme parks. My dad didn't like waiting in line, so we would always get to theme parks like really early to skip the lines and be the first at the door to get in there. I know I'm backing up and backing up, but but to get here. So in 2016 the Dodgers were made the playoffs, and the Houston Astros made the playoffs. So my hometown team was in the playoffs, and my new hometown was in the playoffs, and I was Snapchatting to you know, 30 followers at the time, so nobody really big. And I was like, Oh, this is kind of funny. If, if the if Houston makes the World Series and comes to Los Angeles, I should try to, like, sneak in. Well, that happened. So I was like, Oh, crap. I guess I have to, like, do this now. So the day came. I dressed up like a Dodger security guard. I wore a blue suit. I was like, I didn't have an earpiece. I tried stopping at Walgreens to get, like, a hearing aid that looks like an earpiece, but I ended up just using an iPod earbud that I cut the cord off and tucked it into my shirt. I had an old summer camp NASA badge with my picture from high school that I like, tucked into my sleeve pocket. And yeah, I drove. I left work. I was working at 24 hour fitness, so I changed in the locker room, and people were like, What are you all dressed up for? I was like, Oh, I'm gonna go try to sneak in the World Series. We'll see. They're like, what? Like, yeah, you know, we'll see. So I drive there, I get up in the second inning, so the game's already started, the crowd's already gotten out, and the first sign, I was so nervous, like, the whole day, I was, you know, had this like, anxiety, I guess, you know, just like this pit in my stomach. Of like, what am I doing? It's like, I have to try. That's I didn't care about getting in. I just wanted to try because I told 30 people I was going to go for it, and I'm a man of my word, so let me go after it. And the first real good sign that I got was I showed up to Dodger parking and I found, like, tickets online for, like, 30 dollars for parking. I'm like, alright, I'll spend 30 dollars to, like, get rejected, whatever. I show up to the parking booth, and the guy's like, it's 50 dollars and I was like, what it says 30 online. He's like, that's online, but it's 50 dollars right now. And I was like, well, that's a sign I'm not going to do it. So I asked the guy. I was like, All right, that never mind. Can I just, like, drive in and turn around? And the guy looks at me. He like, looks inside. He looks back at me. He's like, you can just go. And I was like, Oh, okay. So I got in free parking. I got in there. I drove up, parked away, walked up, and my thought was I would just kind of, I don't know, find an entrance, like a like a tunnel entrance, or something like that. And I walked to the floor level, in the street level. Nothing, really, nothing, really, line security, line security. And then my thought was, you know, sometimes they they pat you down, and then there's like, a line in the space in between where they pat you down and where they take your ticket. And I'm like, okay, I can get past the pat down, and then maybe in the area in between, there could be a kerfuffle or a mix of people, I could just kind of slip through, but that wasn't anywhere. And I kept walking. I kept walking. And I've got and Dodger Stadium has like, escalators that go up into like, higher price seating and entrances and VIP entrances. And finally I got to the top, and I was like, well, there's no more places to try, so I guess it's got to be up here. And so before I kind of saw I went behind a car and, like, tightened my tie and put my earbud in, and I walked in the last gate. There was no no security and no ticket taker. It just said, media. On the gate, and there was a person there with a badge around their neck. And I just walked up to them and gave them a nod, looked him in the eye, and then walked through, and I was in and and then when I got in there, there was Dodger security, LAPD, there was C and C staff. There was high celebrity security and suits. Some people had pins, some people had badges, some people had nothing. So I was like, at this point, nobody knows who I am. I'm fine. I can, I can go anywhere, and yeah, I ended up making it into the game. I went to the I went to the, like, VIP suite, where there was people with like, badges on, but not everybody had a badge. And there was like 50 people in there. So I was like, There's no way everybody knows everybody, so not everybody's gonna know me, so that it doesn't matter. And I tucked in my I hid my security thing, and loosened up my tie, and hung out in there. The do perfect guys were there. They had thrown the first pitch of the game, so I sat down with them. Had a beer at one point that was in there. It was great time. It was a good time. Yeah, that was the I snuck into the World Series. Yeah,

Zack Arnold

it's one thing to say. You know what? I'm I'm going to give this a try. Let's see if I can get into the World Series. It's another thing, a whole other level. When you get to whatever that proverbial gate is and you're like, Yeah, never mind. Nope, nope. That's too hard. I'm scared I'm not going to do it. You cross over that threshold, but that wasn't enough for you. It wasn't, you know what I'm going to get through this meaty game, and I'm in the World Series this. No, I think what I want to do is I want to go in the VIP suites, and I want to sit down with the guys that threw the first pitch at the World Series, like, that's the Paul that I've gotten to know, and why I say you will be the next Dos Equis man. Because who does that?

Paul Beckman

I mean, it definitely like, once I'm in there, I get, I don't know, I see stuff where I get an idea of, like, oh, and all this, I think came from, I mean, a love for movies and action movies and thrillers and cons and and so I'll see something and I'll just get an idea in the back of my head. I'm like, Oh, I bet you know a lot of Burn Notice. You know about Burn Notice? Like, I love those, those shows. And like, you know, if you just pretend to do this. And so from watching so many of those, I'll see something and get that idea. And then part of me wants to push that down, because it's I'm afraid of it. And then the other part of me says, ooh, that's something that I'm scared of. Then I should do it. And the more I go after that gut feeling of there's an idea, I shouldn't do it because I'm scared of it. But then I do do it. It doesn't matter if I matter if I succeed or not. I feel so much better having like, tried, I guess. And that's

Zack Arnold

that's one of the things that I wanted to dig her, to dig deeper into, is I wanted, and I'm glad that you already clarified this. There's a big difference between that's really scary and I would never do that. Or even deeper, I'm not the kind of person that would sneak into the World Series, but Paul, he wasn't afraid. He has no fear. And you've already made it clear you have all the same fears that we do. But the difference is that there's a voice in your head that says, This is really scary, so I should do it rather than this is really scary, therefore I'm not going to do it. Where does that come from?

Paul Beckman

Oh, wow, where does that come from? That's a great question.

I I guess I can speak backwards, kind of like building from why I do it now to maybe potentially what started it or what led me to do it. But, I mean, I think just the whole idea of chasing your dream is scary, and you know, a lot of people tell you that it's impossible, or like, oh, okay, you know, especially in our industry and the Hollywood, whatever your dream is, you know, it's people will tell you that it's a dream, and so it's scary to chase after that. So the more I can do, because it's there, you know, there's the fear of failure or not or in not even trying, right? You have to do it even though it's scary. So backing up from that, it's like, okay, how can I present myself with more scenarios where I'm confronted with something that's scary, but I do it anyway, and just kind of build up calluses that will make the big things easier. And where does that come from? I mean, like just growing up, I have got two wonderful parents and I mean, I think a lot of my personality and who I am and decisions I make, and education that I have come from both. My mom and my dad. My mom is super, super tough woman, and she had a difficult childhood, and she worked in an industry with a lot of men, and she just like, she didn't stop her. She's like, she worked and she raised kids, and my dad has just always been somebody that's like, you know, you can, you can do it, you know, whether it's math or Boy Scouts or sports, it's like, it's, don't he? I guess I never really saw my dad afraid of stuff, and I never saw my mom, like, turn away from stuff, and so I just kind of took it as, like, that's how I should approach things. And they both kind of instilled a belief in me that I can do things that are difficult. I mean, we would go on hikes. We like to travel a lot, and we would do six to 10 to 12 mile like hikes. And as a kid, you know my feet would get tired, but you know we could, they could you could carry me, or you could take a break and, like, press on. And so I think just seeing that and respecting both of my parents, I just I wanted to be able to do that too. So I think a lot of that comes from, you know, I was given a lot of gifts and privileges and to not waste that. And I think that, you know, making them proud, because I do love them so much, has been a big part of that. And then now, as I've gotten older, I have one other sibling, I have an older sister, and she has kids, and so they get to be grandparents and do that, and now I'm living in another state for many, many years. It's like, okay, I have to kind of do this on my own and navigate a path that isn't written or isn't pre planned or doesn't have a check box, which is difficult. So that includes doing things that are scary and jumping into the unknown. Ah, man, does that answer the question like it's

Zack Arnold

that's a great The great thing is that there wasn't an answer to the question. It's all it's just all about the conversation. It's just kind of learning a little bit more about how you and everybody else is wired. So, no, that was great. And what I want to kind of pull a thread on, that I think is going to lead me to one of the next areas that I want to dig into, is this idea that, well, I just, I wanted to go after these challenges and these hard things, so I'm ready for the big things, right? So it's almost kind of like you're conditioning yourself for something much bigger. And clearly, this is something that you didn't show clearly, this is something that you wouldn't have chosen for yourself. But give me an idea of how being able to confront these fears and these big things really served you well for what probably was the most pivotal moment of your life.

Paul Beckman

Oh, the big the big C word there, the big C Yeah, oh, man, yeah. Dude, it honestly did. Everything in my life has has prepared me for that. And dude, it was in the right towards the end of coming out of COVID, I got diagnosed with Stage Two cancer. I got the Lance Armstrong kind, so I had to get one of my parts removed, but I had a tumor growth underneath the abdomen that I had to have surgically removed too. But yeah, stage two cancer had to go through three rounds of chemo during, you know, between my second and third round, I got COVID. I got chemo, chemo, COVID, which is, I was like, I love it. People were like, oh, it's like, well, I didn't know I had it pretty rough, but it was, yeah, that was how that was funny. But the whole experience as a whole, right? You get, you get that diagnosis. You're like, oh, whoa, this, this can happen to me. Wow, that's crazy. That's I didn't, I didn't have that on the book, you know. And scary at first, but the hardest, part for me of that whole experience, you know, I I found, I found a part of myself that I didn't recognize. I went and got it checked. The doctor was like, you're fine. And I was like, I don't feel like I'm fine. Check again. And they were like, Oh, yeah. Actually, we should, like, look into that, and then further test. Further tests. Like, yeah, we need to treat this. Now. Let's get this out of here. Let's remove it. Let's start treatment. All of that was like, it happened pretty fast. The most difficult part for me was a phone conversation of the effects of chemo. I was like, Oh, I know I'm gonna lose my hair, but they said I could be infertile and like that idea of, you know, one day I would love to have a family. Of my own, and not being able to have kids that, like, really scared me, and that was the hardest part to mentally get over, was the like, the permanence of that, not of like, Oh, I'm sick. I have to get better, but just like, forever cut to now. Good news. I'm fertile. I can I can still go, which is great. I love that it's not, not everybody comes back with that, but you save some just in case. And then I got tested, and I'm excited for that. We're still good there. But the biggest thing for me was, all right, I have to go on this journey of healing. And I was actually went on a hike by myself up in, like the Los Angeles forest mountains, up up above, like Pasadena, and I got to the top, actually been many times. And I was just like, Okay, I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm going to beat this. And, yeah, that's it, right? So there's no other option, right? I'm going to try to do this thing, and it's scary, and like, chemo, or people want to give you books about how to change your diet and how to change your lifestyle, and, like, that'll heal. And this drug is dangerous, and it can be a lot. So you have to decide, like, which way you're going to do it. And like, I trust medicine, I trust doctors, and, you know, I'll do what I can to, you know, mitigate some of my diet. But like, I think, I think these people know what they're doing, and I'm going to trust in that so I can show up for that. Like, that's all I have to do, is just show up for that. And then I think the other thing that helped me was like, How can I, what can I give to this that others aren't? And that idea was, okay, I'm going to a place where, you know, we sit in a chair and are fed poison for hours at a time, and there's, there's other people like me doing the same thing, oh, I can bring, like, my energy to that. What if I brought fun Paul, funny Paul, into a space where it's kind of like, down and so really, from that mindset of like, Oh, I'm going to do it. And two, I can, like, bring my gift and my personality to a place that's not that fun in hopes of brightening other people. I think, I think I can get through this a lot better. And I stuck to that, you know, and I think that was, like, really helpful. It was just the mindset of, yeah, it's gonna suck. But on the other side of it is life for one and, you know, I now I look at it as, as as and again, this is, I don't know where this mindset came from, but it's just like, it's a positive for me, like I've been through cancer now, and I've been through chemo, which is sucks and is really tough, and You lose your appetite and sometimes you just hurt, but I got through that, and like, now I know I can do like, things that are really, really hard, and I take that as a big positive. And just as you know, getting into an ice bath is difficult, but you're if you can, like, control your breath in that moment, then when you're out in the real world and things happen or don't go as according to plan, and it's stressful or panicky, or you get in a car accident, whatever it is, like, oh, I can be calm in stressful situations and painful situations and situations where I'm suffering. So this, this is nothing. And that's kind of been my takeaway is just that, like, oh yeah, I did this hard thing. I know what extreme suffering feels like, and to be on the other side of that, it's like it feels great, and like every day is a gift. And I mean, I don't wish this on anybody, but this is part of my journey. And I don't know if I'm I'm it happened, and I wouldn't be who I am without it happening. So in a way, I'm glad it happened, because I'm stronger for it. Now,

Zack Arnold

first of all, amazing what? I didn't really see you so much during the journey, because, again, it happened during COVID. So as I kind of knew pre cancer Paul, and then I remember meeting post cancer Paul, and I think it was at Wes is like, gender reveal party, party or something, not for Wes first kid, but I remember it was the first time I'd seen you in a couple of years, and your hair was just coming back. You were the exact same person, like, I couldn't take a smile off your face with a baseball bat, right? And I was like, it's, it's the same guy, like you were a little bit leaner, didn't have quite as much hair, but I'm like, it's still the same guy. And I was fascinated by that, and now I have a better understanding of what that looked like in between. And I think the the two biggest things that I want to go into even a little bit deeper, are one, this idea that I can. Picture you sitting on whatever the summit might be in this hiking trail, looking out at the city, and saying, Well, all right, so I'm going to beat this, because there is no other option. But then I think a really important part of this is when you ask yourself the question, What can I bring to this? I don't think most people would do that. I don't think most people would say, What can I bring to this? Most people would say, what are you going to do for me? How are you going to take care of me? And you said, Nope. In this situation, what could I bring to it? And the fact that you said, I can just bring I can bring Polly, right? I can bring my sense of humor, I can bring my light hearted nature. But in those moments, is it like I can just picture you like sitting in the chair with other people that are getting chemo? Is it a matter of it just effortlessly comes out, like, you're like, I'm fun, Paul. I'm just gonna make jokes and I'm gonna make light of this. Or is it a matter of like, I really just want to sit here and I want to be miserable and I want to feel like shit, but I know that I feel this calling to bring this light energy, which? Which one is it?

Paul Beckman

Or other? Yeah, it's, yeah. I mean, like, as far as like, comedy goes, like, I can't, you can't force comedy, right? Comedy will come up when it comes up. And like, there's a joke, there's an opportunity, for sure, and like that, that I don't plan that just like, comes out and like, there's a moment, I'm taking it. And then as far as like, the second half, yeah, it's, it's kept trying to catch myself in a place of, oh, I'm, I'm, I'm taking, I'm taking more in this situation than giving. Right? If you remove me from the situation, is it helping? Right? So if, if I'm, if I'm moaning and groaning like, Oh, this is, this is tough. It's like, oh, that's not helping people there. So if I was just not there doing it, be better off. And then it's catching myself or noticing that to say, okay, rather than take energy away from others. Here's an opportunity to give and doing so and flipping that I it gives, it comes back to me, because then I give my perch self permission to, you know, feel better about creating that, that that switch and giving out energy rather, rather than taking it away. And, yeah, and that, like, room, it can be tough. Like, some days, you know, I just want to, I don't have, I didn't have energy to give, right? And so I know I'm, I'm going to, I'm not going to take it away from others, but I can, like, allow myself to keep it for myself and sleep, put my headphones on and just like, rest and like, that's permission to write. But yeah, some, sometimes it's really difficult in there and people are loud or asking for a lot of help. And in those moments, it's just walking by them, and, you know, giving a smile you have to like you have to carry your IV bag to the bathroom and walk around with it, and there's nurses with snacks. And so it's like those moments where you can play with people, or give out a little bit of laugh and energy, or just smiles, right? And I think, like psychologists say, right, if you force yourself to smile, eventually, like your mood will change with it. So I think it's just presenting those, those scenarios.

Zack Arnold

I clearly, like you very much, a supporter of Western medicine when it comes to this kind of stuff. I have my other feelings about, like, the Western medical system, and I'm sure you have plenty to share there that probably isn't relevant. But as far as, like, the idea of, I'm going to trust the experts that treat people with cancer all day, every day, very much on the same page. But I would also argue, but I want to get your perspective, because I haven't been through this and you have. Do you think that having that mindset and that approach of, what can I bring to this, and being the guy that brings positivity and laughter? Do you think that that had a significant impact positively in the fact that you got through this to the other side?

Paul Beckman

I think that aspect made it easier, less difficult. But I will say 100% it was the action of I'm deciding I'm going to beat this and will that met the biggest difference, right? The positive mindset and the attitude, the energy I'm bringing that made it easier and gave me more purpose within it, and helped me lead down that roadway. But it was 100% I think, the decision right, trusting in the medicine that also made it easier, because I can stop worrying or thinking about if I'm doing the right thing or if I need. Be doing other things, or taking in other supplements or food, whatever, that made it easier, because it's like, okay, trusting the people that have been doing this for years of their life and 1000s of experts before them have also led to that, and just like giving up to to them on, on the under the belief that, like that will be the right thing. So just deciding, yes, I'm going to do it, and yes I'm going to I'm going to trust and that just it, just, man, it just made it so much easier. Like a weight was lifted. Just like, you know, if you you know, need to go to law school, or whatever it is. Like, you can I, what am I to do? Like, oh, you show up for class and like, you go to class. Okay, I'll figure it out. I'm going to do the assignments right? It's, it's so much easier when you have assignments to do, and then you don't have to think about which assignments to do, and then do them. You just show up and do them. And that made it definitely easy for me. But like, I've told people now who are, who are going through anything. I've, like, I've had friends that reach out to me afterwards, like, I was diagnosed with breast cancer, like, can you tell me about your journey, you know? And I'm like, you know, I won't know what you go through. But I think the biggest thing that helped me is like, Yeah, I'm going to do going to do this. And people have families, but some people, and this is, I don't this is a part a hard thing that I have understand, something I have a hard time understanding, is, like, some people just aren't sure if they can make that decision, or aren't sure they can go through with it, or aren't sure. And like, they're in a different journey, and they've different experiences. And like, that's I, I'm so grateful that, like, I had a life beforehand, to get to a point where I could say, Yeah, I'm gonna do this. And like, Okay, I'm gonna go do that. But that was the biggest, the biggest help for me was just deciding, yep, I'm gonna beat this, I'm gonna fight this, I'm gonna do this.

Zack Arnold

Was there ever a moment, a test result, anything that happened where you're like, maybe I'm wrong. Um, was there any, ever, any doubt?

Paul Beckman

No, there were difficult times where it's like, how am I going to get through this? But like, I remember, there was the it's you do you do treatment, like chemo treatment, where you're like, you're on an IV of this drug that goes into you for like an hour or two, and you go Monday through Friday for like, two three hours every morning for five days, and then you take like, a week or two off, and then you do it again. And then maybe your white blood cell count is low, so you have to take an extra week off, and then you do it again. Or maybe you get COVID, so you have to take two weeks off, and then you do it again. So that way, when you start up on Monday, you've had a couple of weeks before you to, like, recuperate, and you're like, all right, Monday, like, I got this, you know, you're dripping in you're like, whatever. And then Tuesday comes, you're like, okay, and then Wednesday comes, you're like, all right, I mean, kind of tired of this. And then Thursday comes, and you're like, alright, this kind of sucks. And then Friday comes, you're like, I am not feeling up to this. And then Saturday hits when you're done, and then you, like, feel like crap. And then, like, Sunday, you really, really feel like crap. So there was, like, one of those Saturday nights and just, just a tough day, you know, I haven't eaten a lot, and just feeling down. And I talked to my best friend's mom, who was a doctor, and she was like my confirmation sponsor growing up, and she told me all the things I could do, as far as, like, taking care of my pain and management and talk to my friends. I talked to my mom, and then it was like, late at night, and I'm just by myself alone, suffering. And, you know, at the lowest low, you're like, Yeah, I want to, like, oh, I want my mom, you know, but it's like, I've already talked to her, so, like, she can't tell me anything else. Let me just, like, sit in this you can't fall asleep and you're tired. And, like, that was like, definitely, like, the hardest part where I'm just like, Okay, I'm just, I just have to suffer right now, but like, okay, that's then it became that. And it's like, okay, that's my task. I can do that. Because once I got all the information and like, you take this medicine and you've done that, you've done that, there's nothing else you can do. It's like, okay, not hurting myself more, but I've done everything I can do, so now what I can do is exist in this pain or whatever, and like, even like, that's still something like that was something that I could do, which was just like, bear it, but it was never like, oh, all hope is lost. Right? Or like, oh, I won't be able to do this. It was just like, What can I do next? Or what can I do right now? And that was the hardest time it got to but even then, it was like, Okay, I'll do this. And I don't know where that comes from. Zack, like, I don't know what gave me those powers, or whatever. But, I mean, ego is a lot like, I've always been a class clown. I like to be liked, and I like to be strong, and like that came into it too, like knowing one day maybe I'd have to tell the story. It's like, I want to show up for that journey. You know, who knows. But here we are. So I guess it worked.

Zack Arnold

Clearly it worked, would be an understatement. And we're going to transition to another area in a second. But I think there's one thing that I picked up on that I think is so important for anybody that's listening to recognize the power of mindset and the power of the language that we use. I think there's a gigantic difference. And you said this, and I'll pull it out again, where you the question you were asking yourself was not, am I going to get through this? The question you were asking yourself was, how am I going to get through this? Those are two opposite ends of a spectrum. One of them has doubt, am I going to be able to do this? The other one is, well, I know I'm going to be able to but how am I going to that? To me, is the difference. That's the mindset shift that's so important that I think is the difference between I don't know what's going to happen, versus, I know I'm going to come out on the other end. I just got to get through hell to get there.

Paul Beckman

Yeah. And I mean, like, you know a lot about, like, the how, right? It's like, you get to the question of what, and then we can figure it out the how. And that's really the fun juice is getting to all those steps. But yeah, it's like, give me an action step, and then I can, I can do it. But like, what are we what are we acting on? And for that specific thing, you know, it was a very clear, well, beating this. Okay, now what?

Zack Arnold

Yeah, exactly. Just to, paraphrase. I would like to be able to quote, word for word, but I'm not going to get it right. But to paraphrase, Nietzsche, he said that a man that knows his why can bear almost any how. And you've talked about how I see a purpose in doing this, like I'm going to show up for others. What can I bring to it? But the one that really stuck with me, because it's a it's a technique that I use as well when I'm just absolutely going through hell is you said, Well, I have to get through the other side, because I need to be able to tell the story, and I need to be able to tell the story to other people, like that gives you purpose, that gives a reason to the suffering. And I think that's absolutely invaluable when you're going through hell,

Paul Beckman

yeah, and, you know, an identity through that, right? I get it, you know, label myself as a cancer survivor. That's cool. That's cool. Yeah, it's, it's and knowing that I have, I still have dreams to achieve, and like, I still see a future of my life and where it's going. So it's like, I have to get there. So, like it clearly, I gotta get through this to get there, you know? And again, like that. That's a helpful thing, right? Some people, I mean, I've seen through through family. Like, some people have kids, they need to live for some people want to live for their family or their parents or their spouses, right? Like, what? What is your reason to need to do this? And looking into that and finding that for yourself, whatever that

Zack Arnold

Well, I do want to transition more to where you talked about like you do has do still have goals. You do still have dreams. We're going to talk more about those. But I want to transition in a little unconventional way. We've clearly set you up with somebody that, on the surface, somebody would say, Well, Paul is fearless, and I don't think you're fearless. I think that you have more courage than you have fear, and that you have faced either you've created these really scary situations for yourself and said, I'm going to face this fear and I'm going to do something crazy. And the Dodgers thing is, like one of 100 and we're going to need a 20 hour, 20 part podcast to cover all of them, because that basically, that wasn't like one thing you did, like, that's Paul. That's just Paul being Paul, right? But I wanted to set the stage with that. So between managing and facing those fears, and then facing the fear of I literally could die, but I'm choosing to just say that I'm going to get through this, and how am I going to get through this? I frame that and kind of set you up in your both your courage and your ability to manage fear, to say the following, I've never seen more terror on your face than when I told you it's time for you to start sending cold outreach emails to strangers.

Paul Beckman

Yes, I have fears. I I'm scared of things, putting myself out there, yeah, man, oh

Zack Arnold

yeah. When you, when you were in my networking class, I was like, this is not the Paul that I know, because you were really shy and really trepidatious and, like. Dude, you you snuck in to a Dodgers game the World Series, pretended to be security and went to the VIP box. You overcame cancer and the look on your face when I said, let's pick somebody that you can send an outreach email to that you admire deer and headlights frozen,

Paul Beckman

yeah, yeah, fear of just getting in people's way, I guess, I don't know. Yeah, man. So what's

Zack Arnold

the difference? What's the difference between here's somebody that I really want to connect with, I want to learn more. How did you achieve this in your career? Etc, etc, whatever. The what's the difference between that fear and fuck it, I'm going to sneak into the World Series.

Paul Beckman

Yeah, I guess, like other people are affected by it. I guess you

Zack Arnold

know how so

Paul Beckman

well. I mean, I guess other people are affected technically by anything that you do. Yeah, I just think, like, the World Series is something like, If I fail, I face the repercussions of that. Sending out an outreach email. I

Zack Arnold

can't believe how uncomfortable you are right now. This is

Paul Beckman

fascinating. It's dude. It's, I guess it's, it's ego, you know, and which is funny, because in this industry, it's, you have to have it, and have to be willing to let it go. Man, yeah, it's, it's putting out in front of people that, hey, this is, this is what I'm doing. This is what I'm trying to do. And I know you're doing your thing, but maybe you can help me do my thing for a second. And I don't want to encroach on your space, but I am encroaching on your space, but I think, I think, I think you'd be cool with that, because if you knew what I was doing, you'd be down, which is, you know, you've helped me see more of Zack.

Zack Arnold

Well, the other reason I bring this up too is that you and I might literally just take this and incorporate it into the work where I teach people how to reach out, how to build relationships, asking the question, What can I bring to this? That's one of the first things that we talked about, is, what can I bring to this? What value can I bring? And I think that that at least took a little bit of that fear or trepidation of, well, now I'm encroaching on somebody else's life and somebody else's inbox, right? And you're, you're really good at having that mindset of, what can I bring to this for them? How can I reciprocate that value?

Paul Beckman

Yeah, and then just understanding too that, like we're all people, and like we're all working on our own stuff, and to hear that other people are, you know, interested or inspired by things that we're doing and, you know, might have some value to add to us if, even if it's just making us feel valued and and respected, it's like, oh yeah. Like, we're all on this journey. We're all trying to get places, and have had people above us help us, bring us up. So why can't they help you, bring you up, and vice versa? I mean, I think one of my This stems from that like fear and like trying to be honest and vulnerable is just like the my own question of, like, Am I doing enough work? Do Am I worthy of being in the same room as these people who are working really hard and have been consistently working really hard, right? And like, I'm, you know, I am fearless and going into the World Series, but other people have worked really hard and afford to buy $1,000 tickets, right? I mean, I do like that. I didn't. Nobody couldn't get in because of me, because I didn't do that. But it's like those people are doing those things right, and I don't want to be one to take shortcuts in in an industry like this, but in, in getting to where I have, you know, seeing the seeing the angles and stuff like, there's always more work to be done. I So maybe my fear is getting found out that like, I've snuck my way like into success and like don't deserve it or don't belong here, and trying to find a way to like, show myself that I do, and I can also match that with work behind it. And going into that,

Zack Arnold

I find that really interesting, that you're literally the guy that snuck into the World Series, but you don't want to be found out as somebody that took a shortcut and snuck into where you are in your career. But that certainly says a lot about who you are and your character, and I can see where you're coming from, where you want to earn it, right? I'm realizing you my understanding, because I always conflate these two. You grew up in Houston, you grew up in Texas, but you were went to school in the Midwest, but it sounds like there's at least a little little bit of Miss Midwestern nice that rubbed off on you, because it sounds like if I were. To change the Dodger situation, and where you can sneak into the World Series, and you can go to the VIP box, and you can hobnob with the people that threw the first pitch. But if you do that, somebody else loses their ticket in return. Sounds like you're the kind of person that would never in a million years have taken that chance. Correct,

Paul Beckman

correct, right, right, just like you know, before the Dodgers things in college sounds like sneaking into bars or or whatever, right? There's a line and people getting in and, like, counting it whatever, like, I would never want to cut a line, and somebody sees that I'm cut a line, and then, like, this guy's getting ahead, and so therefore they're not getting in soon enough, right? So people know that they're being put out. But if you sneak in the back and they don't know, and the ticket counter isn't changed, and the quantity isn't changed, and nobody's affected, then, like, in my brain, it's like, okay, I'm not putting somebody out right in that in that tweet. Yeah, so if it was like, you have to cut in front of this person and they see you, and they think you're POS and that you're putting them out. It's like, No, I would never do that, right? Or those, like videos where the kids take milk jugs and, like, slam them in the grocery store. It's like, you're ruining somebody's day. Like somebody has the effects of that. So I'm very conscious of, like, how am I affecting other people? And in my weird, you know, allowance of my brain, of the things that I do.

Zack Arnold

All right, so now I've got all kinds of interesting stuff to work with here. So I want to now talk a little bit more about this journey that you're on next, because you've alluded to like, I've got dreams. I've got things I still want to accomplish. I want to get a better sense of what those look like. The reason being that I've done many, many podcast interviews in the past, either with world class experts, authors, filmmakers, Oscar Emmy winners, right? Like, I've run the gamut, and I always talk to people about, you know, I want to hear your origin story. How did you break in? How did you achieve the success? But what I haven't done enough of is talk to people that are living in the messy middle, people where I believe their success is inevitable, but they're not there yet, and I'm not even sure they believe that their success is inevitable. So I want to talk a little bit more about what that journey looks like for you, the things that you're doing now the things that you want to achieve, and then we're going to come back to this idea of, well, if I were to get in their inbox, it's just like taking a gallon of milk and breaking it in the grocery store. Now I've ruined somebody's day, or even worse, well, if I'm in somebody's inbox, I'm cheating. That's a shortcut, and I'm taking an opportunity away from somebody else.

Paul Beckman

So So I guess what's the question again, it's just like,

Zack Arnold

where the place to start is? I just, I want to everybody here now we can officially start our conversation right now. We can talk about, what are your dreams? What are you working towards? What are you doing now? Just kind of getting a better sense of where are you in your journey currently, and where you're going next.

Paul Beckman

I like that. You've, you've spent a lot of your time talking to people who've made it and how they got there, and now you're, you're, you're getting ahead of the timeline and talking to people on their route to have made it. That's cool. I accept this positive outlook into my life. Zack, thank you so much. And

Zack Arnold

by the way, let me, let me frame this really, really carefully so people don't hear it the wrong way. This isn't about you haven't made it yet, and you're not good enough. This is I know you, and I'm really good at recognizing potential in others, and I don't think you've scratched the surface of who Pauli B is going to become. I totally see it, completely and totally see it, but I think it's really interesting to have these conversations in the middle of it, because the vast majority, if not all, the people listening, they're not on the other end, holding their Oscars, holding their Emmys, holding their, you know, huge, you know, box office Bonanza projects that they're on. Most people are like, Well, I'm in the messy middle too. And I think it's really important to have those conversations with people that are in it, rather than they're on the other side of it,

Paul Beckman

man. I love that man. And, yeah, it's, I mean, since a kid, I was a kid watching movies with with my dad, I just, I love movies. And I mean, in like, Raiders of the Lost Ark was the coolest thing I'd ever seen. And I wanted to be Indiana Jones. And then I just kept fall in love with movies. The minor were from Power Rangers. The movies was so cool. The colors of that and and then I remember Jurassic Park was the first PG 13 movie ever saw. We watched on like DVD, and like that blew my mind. And then I remember I was in Illinois at my dad's like college best friend's house. He's like an uncle with cousins, and we watched gladiator and the matrix in their, like basement projector TV. And I was just like, oh my god, movies are so cool. Yeah. So I've always, I've always loved movies, and. I wanted to, I want to be an action star man. I want to be, I want to be on that big screen and just be involved with movies. And that was kind of my dream as a kid. And along that way, you know, you grow up, and ideas were shifted to like, oh, that's probable or impossible, you know, to be there. Oh, okay, well, if acting is impossible, maybe I can direct that's more achievable, which is hilarious to think of now. So then I got behind the camera. I did a lot of, like filming stuff my junior, senior year of high school, and kind of became like the video guy. And that led me to Iowa, where my parents influenced me to seek out a degree in which it had a high rate of success for employment. So I found the University of Iowa where I was able to get a degree in Industrial Engineering and a minor in cinematography. So I was kind of able to do both. I worked for the admissions department my the last three years of college as a video producer, making content for the school, like, you know what majors that the school has, or like profile pieces on kids. And so I was able to kind of like, still be around film, definitely not like acting. And then I graduated, and, man, before we even graduated, I had an offer from John Deere. The we had, like, a career fair, the like, last couple weeks before finals, and I remember everybody had, like, everybody in the engineering school had, like, lined up to go talk to John Deere, to give him their resume, and I was like, that line's too long. So I went and talked to, like everybody else, and you know, the career fair is a couple hours. And I talked to some other companies and that, like, gave them resumes, and they were scheduling interviews the next day, and scheduled some interviews. So then by the time it had kind of ended, the room had died down and John Deere, the line was gone. So I walked up to them. I was like, hey, what do you what are you guys doing here? They're like, Oh, we're doing this. Can we see your resume? I show my resume. They're like, Oh, that's great. Can we, like, schedule an interview with you? And I was like, No. They're like, what I was like, tomorrow? They're like, what I was like, Oh yeah, sorry, I got, I'm all like, booked up, I guess, you know, I because I just, I didn't care, you know, I was like, John Deere is, like, the biggest one here. They don't, they don't want to talk to me. And they like, I guess they dug that. So they called me and they're like, can we schedule a private interview with you the next day? All right? And the guy that hired me, he loved that I was doing film stuff, because, you know, we had, luckily I had a 4.0 GPA was just like, You got to have that. But he just loved that I was doing something that wasn't just engineering. And so, like, film helped me get that job, and I worked there for three and a half years, and it was between John Deere and this other company that was, like a manufacturing company that had a place in, like Wisconsin, but they also had a partner company in California. And so I was like, Oh, I could work here, and then maybe transfer to there. And, like, I got flown out to interview with them, and it was really between them and John Deere, but I remember as a call with my dad. He was like, you know, I Googled both of them, and, like this other company doesn't even have a Wikipedia page, you know, I was like, Alright, let me go with, like, John Deere. And it was good, you know, I got I worked it for three and a few years, and got vested and and then it was time to, like, it's, I still felt the calling to LA. So I moved out here, like, eight years ago, and it's been a process of, like, trying to unlock in me what I actually want to do and become, you know, like I for a long time I didn't allow myself to, like, believe I wanted to be an actor, because it was so impossible, or if I could do it, you know, or do all those things. And like, I want to be all those things. And now, I mean, now that I've been here long enough, and maturing, and it's funny, the more I get closer to understanding how improbable it is, the more I'm also like but it is what I want to do, and that's okay. I'm I'm excited to do it, and I got my backup job out of the way. So here I am. I want to be an action star. I want to be a comedy action star, I love comedy. I have plans to be on SNL, write a movie, get that made, make movies and just, just entertain people. Man, I think, I think there's room definitely online too, and YouTube and like Tiktok as a means to get in front of people and try to be a voice of reason and inclusion in a society with people that look like me, who talk down about others, and have have to be a different kind of voice that that's for good and just make art. And I got a lot of friends that are doing that, and in an industry that's. Is divided between art and money, you know, trying to find a sweet balance of that. Yeah, man, I want to be, I want to be all over Hollywood and be in it, and be of it, and it's crazy and silly and ridiculous, but that's where I'm drawn to. So that's, that's why I'm here, and that's, that's why, you know, you're one of the cool people in my circle, Zack that, you know, combines a lot of stuff with, like fitness and industry, and I love all those things. And that's, that's, that's my big like, I've talked to you about all these people that inspire me. You know, we've talked about Kevin Hart and Chris Pratt and Tom Cruise is like a big part, just because he's I love stunts and crazy stuff. I want to be able to do that, get paid to, like, go jump out of planes. Oh, that'd be so cool. Zack, that'd be so cool. Yeah, that's

Zack Arnold

where you and I are very different people, very different people, because I definitely don't embrace the level of craziness or fear all the other things that you do, which is why, you know I admire you and find you so fascinating in so many respects. And clearly, I want to be one of those people that's helping you figure all this out and navigate it. There's just kind of one little anecdote that I think is going to really tie up a portion of your story before we dig a little bit deeper into the next area. So I'm going to put a pin in this for a second, but I don't want to lose this thread about the value that John Deere saw in you actually having a more diverse set of skills and diverse interests, because I really believe that's the direction we're going, and it's one of the things I find so fascinating about you, is the diversity of skills, interests, all the different things you want to do. But I want to tie up this John Deere story, because it just it's just too perfect. Didn't you end up not only working for John Deere, but being in a John Deere commercial as an actor,

Paul Beckman

isn't that full circle? Man, oh, what? Yeah, it wasn't a John Deere commercial, but I was on a John Deere mower for, like, a mower shave commercial. So I was like, you know, six years after I left this company that I spent three and a half years working for now I'm, like, on their machine and a product in the field that I want to do. Yeah, that was very, a very beautiful moment that I enjoy and I'm grateful for and stuff like that, that I choose to see it as a sign that, like, Okay, I'm in the right direction. I'm going in the right place. And man, super cool, super cool to be, to be on the other side of that. Man, super, super cool. Yeah,

Zack Arnold

like I said, a full circle moment. And one of the traps that I just find myself falling into way too often, is always focusing on the goals ahead, focusing on the things that I haven't accomplished, putting together the action steps right? And sometimes I forget to look over my shoulder and say, Oh yeah, I've done some cool shit. So I just, I wanted to plant that seed that it's not a matter of we're just beginning this journey like you've already been in commercials. You've done some shorts or some films, and literally full circle from working for John Deere in Iowa to maybe not being in a John Deere commercial, but being in a commercial as an actor sitting on a John Deere right? So you're in it. You're in that messy middle already. Now we just want to talk a little bit more about kind of navigating it all, you know, all these different like pivoting from this to this, to this to that. Just kind of give me the short list, or everybody the short list of here are just the job titles that I hold on a weekly basis.

Paul Beckman

Oh, man, job titles that I hold on a weekly basis now and in the last couple of years, I'm a server. I serve at the Milky Way, which is a restaurant owned by Amblin entertainment, Mr. Steven Spielberg, his beautiful late mother Lily, owns and created that several, several years ago. She passed away a couple years ago, so I served there, like four days a week. I'm a caterer. I do personal training, as you know, here and there. I also, man, I've been a fitness director at LA Fitness. I've sold water, I've worked for GrubHub corporate on the phone. Oh, man. I've been a nightclub promoter. My first job in LA just whatever I can get my hands on. And then, yeah, now, now it's just a mixture of, right? I'm, I'm staying active. I do. I do a lot of, like classes preparing for, like, the action side of stuff, whether that's fitness or or boxing or parkour school. I'm in what? Writing programs. I've been doing the Groundlings for eight years that works on comedy and writing and creating characters. I'm in acting classes, whether that's on camera, acting or auditioning process through different studios, John markler and Margie haver, different places, staying you know, trying to dip into social media, working with comedy groups who are creating content and just getting in front of people. It's funny, like I did this. America's Next Top wellness coach is the most recent thing I did, which is kind of a satire on the wellness industry now. And my parents are like, what's that for? I'm like, great question. It's, it goes out there, right? You create something. And even, you know, even Oscar winning movies today are like, what happened to that movie? Right? It's, but it's, it's, you're creating something, you're working you're working on your craft, you're putting in repetitions. You're getting in front of the camera, you're getting in front of the patent paper, you're getting in front of people's eyes. Like, I love it. Anytime something drops on social media that you think, like, whatever. Like, what's this gonna Is this gonna go viral? Does? It doesn't matter. But like, somebody, you get in somebody's brain that day and they reach out, like, Oh, I saw you're doing this. Are you still doing this? Let's get together on that. And it's like all those things, like, can you keep yourself in it? It's like, oh, you're not you're not there. You haven't made it yet. But it's like, that's you're you're still in people's brains. How are you creating the next opportunity? Are you putting yourself out there? So just like, consistently trying to do that? I mean, my big thing right now is I've really like six, seven years ago, I really was steadfast on getting through these Groundlings program, where Will Ferrell, Kristen, Wiig, Melissa McCarthy, they all went through that. You get to Sunday company, where you perform basically an SNL show once a week, and you're writing new sketches weekly. And from there, a lot of these people get discovered or get noticed by people that come to these shows. And so in the back of my head, it was always like, Oh, I'll get there and like, that's where to discover it. And then I'll go to SNL, and then I'll go and each class is like a pass or fail. And I pass the past the audition to get in, and I passed the basic, and I passed the intermediate, I passed the advance, I passed the writing program one, I passed the writing program two. So all these things that, like, I had control over the work I put into, and now I'm in a place where, alright, you're kind of at the tip of the funnel, and you're in the last part, and a lot of people have gotten to that funnel, and now it's a lottery, and I'm just waiting to get my name drawn out of a hat to get into, like, the grad school program. And it's been interesting, as this has been about a year and a half to two years now, of this part of the process where it's something that's out of my control, and in noticing that there is frustration in that it's also been a gift of like, okay, now I'm at a part where something is out of my control and I essentially have to wait. What can I do myself to align myself more with what I continue to want to do? What is my life outside of that look like? What else am I achieving? And so it's kind of given me again, permission as well as reflection, to be like, All right, what are the things that I can control and what can I work on so I'm not just sitting around and like and waiting, and that is what we're talking about, like, getting involved and taking more classes and doing more writing and getting in and networking and meeting people, just trying to have that mentality of, like, you know, what am I? What am I focusing on, right now, right? And like you talk about Zack, like, goals and whatnot, like a lot of these things are, can be like, reaching out. And we are in an industry where people, who you talk to, like, Man, are getting in front of people and is trying not to beat myself up or like I'm not doing enough, or I could. I could reach out to more people, but I could, and I should. How can I do that? Who will that next person be? Let me like, reflect on that.

Zack Arnold

Well, first of all, it certainly doesn't sound like you need to beat yourself up because you're not doing enough. Sounds like you're you're keeping pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty busy. Which kind of, kind of brings me to the my my next kind of two part question, and maybe it's two totally separate questions, the first of which would be, it's fascinating to me that as a quote, unquote kid from the south or the Midwest with an industrial engineering degree and three years of John Deere under his belt, he's talked his way into convincing somebody you can do all of these different jobs in totally different fields with different skill sets. So I guess the first part of this question is, how are you able to actually leverage yourself to get those jobs? And then once you're balancing all of it, how the hell are you balancing all of it? I.

Paul Beckman

Yeah, man, I mean leveraging getting those jobs, I always said, told myself I'm a great interviewer, so as long as I get an interview like I'm set, and that's hurt me once, where I was like too, a little too confident. And I think they could, it was like, a serving job at, like, a nice restaurant or whatever. And I was, I was like, I already had in my head. I was like, Look, I'm not going to work this day and I'm going to take off this day. It's like, you can't get in a restaurant industry. You have to be available seven days a week. Pro Tip, once you get started in there, then you can start to, like, manage your time off at work. But yeah, I just, like, confident my abilities. And I think, I mean, the thing of the great thing about engineering is, like, they taught us, like how to learn, right, and like how to solve problems. So sure, there was a lot of math in there, but it's really like looking at scenario, and my specific type of engineering degree, which is like industrial which is literally just like process management, looking at how something is and then figuring out how to way to make it faster more efficient. So I think that that helped me in terms of whatever job I'm going into, I can come at it from a place of like, look, I might not know what you what you're doing, but I can figure it out pretty quick. And then I have a damn good belief that I can, you know, help to make it better. But then my other gift that I also bring into that is I'm going to make the people working around me feel better, and therefore work better, because I'm going to get to know every single person in my place of work, so whether that's at a restaurant, the back of the house, the front of house, the kitchen staff, the cleaning staff, like I know everybody, and I see everybody, I make sure everybody feels seen, and then like, people want are excited when I come into work. Man, I heard this, this waiter that I worked with for like, an event, like, we'll do, like, a big Sunday dinner, and we have, like, all the staff come in, and I usually just work by myself for lunch 90% of the time. So at a big event, we have everybody there, and one of our new waiters, he saw me. He was like, man, Paul, I saw you come in today, and I got relieved. I was like, excited. Like, oh, it's gonna be a good day. Like, Paul's here. I'm like, Dude, that made my day. Man, like, and knowing that, and coming into a job interview saying, like, look, there are people here that are good, really good at what they do, and they're gonna put their head down, they're gonna do their job. To do their job. And then there are managers that, like, know the business and like, know how it needs to be operated, whether, whichever role I'm in, I'm going to see everybody and make sure that they feel seen to where, like, we can communicate why something isn't that because there's, there's not a lot of good managers. I'll say that, you know, and like, I don't mind managing from a non managing position, and part of the reason for that is my flexibility, right? I've, I've kept myself out of management for the last four or five years, so I can be flexible with auditions or films or screenings or shoots, I'm able to just like, take off, and that's, that's why I keep flexible. That's why I work three jobs, you know. I I'll work one shift at one restaurant, and then I'll go work a bar shift at another restaurant. So I'm working over 12 hours, but I don't get paid overtime because it's two different jobs, you know. But I had the flexibility to say, like, I'm not showing up today, or I've got to shoot today, and I've created relationships with everybody I work with to be like, Oh, that's okay. Like, Paul, you take it off. Like, your help when you're here. Yeah. So the belief that, you know, I can figure stuff out, and then, man, people are everywhere we go. And I'm really excited to take that into the film industry, because I know that it's a stressful job, and being on set is stressful, and the old ways of yelling to get what you want, I just like, I don't, I don't agree with that. Man, you can just look somebody in the face and tell them like we're not doing that, or we are, you know, and I've seen that in a restaurant where the chef is, you know, wants their way, and there hasn't been somebody to just step up to the chef and be like, Dude, you don't need to talk that way. Like, I'm not going to take that. And I get purpose from, I don't know, being able to speak like that for other people that are there and that that helps me feel a little bit better about, you know, being in a position such as that, even even though I'm not managing engineering company or directing $100 million budget, it's, it's nice to know that like I'm getting, I'm helping other people out, while creating a space for me to have as much flexibility as possible. All,

Zack Arnold

and I think with all the things that you mentioned, whether it's that you're really good at managing teams, you're really good at figuring out how to make people feel included, you've got your creativity, you've got your ability to, you know, bring confidence to any situation. You understand comedy, you understand writing, you understand story. Within all of that is a very unique asymmetric advantage that I believe that you're going to hold over just about everybody else, where you might be against somebody that's just as funny as you in the Groundlings, but they probably don't have the ability to walk into a room and feel people included and seen, or you might be against a manager of a team, but they don't have your comedy skills or like there are all these different unique things that when you bring all of them together, I don't think anybody can compete with that when you write, when you find the right space for all those things overlapped, right? So yeah, having said that, this begs a really important question, What the hell did you ever need me for? Specifically, when it comes to networking and building relationships. You should be teaching me how to build relationships,

Paul Beckman

because you're the man, Zack, dude. I was like, I gotta get in this guy's I gotta get in with this guy. I gotta get this guy's circle. Man. Just it was so funny, because my my best friend, has been out here, and I've known us in second grade. You know, he's Bobby. He's been doing music and something, and I remember he was teaching your kids piano, like, dude, I'm teaching, I'm teaching piano, and their dad is the editor. Burn Notice, I'm like, Burn Notice, that's like, our favorite show. Like, no way, Hollywood. We're in Hollywood. And now here I am. It's dude. It's so beautiful, man, it's so beautiful. But like you, yeah, like you're, you're somebody that has shown what it what it takes to to navigate into the space that you want and create for yourself. And have, you know, the tangible proof that it's, it's, it's doable. And then also, you know, it's one thing to hear from somebody I work with who's 18 to be like, Oh, you're good at what you're do. And it's another thing to hear from somebody who's successful and experienced and doing well to say, like, hey, you've got some, some real possibilities here, you know. And I think that all that helps for sure.

Zack Arnold

Well, I definitely will continue to to share my assertion publicly on this recording, that I have all the faith in the world that someday you're going to be the Paul Beckman, not just Paul Beckman, you're going to be the Paul Beckman for sure. But one other thing that I want to add before we kind of start to wrap this up, is that it's one thing to say all of these things about I really want to be there for people. I want to, you know, help manage this and be the light hearted person. It's another thing to actually see it in action, so without self deprecating myself too much, because this could be an entire episode getting into my head and all my shortcomings. But not so long ago, you and I in West decided that we were just on a whim. What the hell? Let's go climb Half Dome in Yosemite like it's just a thing, like it's just a jaunt. And for those that don't know, climbing Half Dome in Yosemite one of the most difficult day hikes, at least in California, if not the United States. I mean, it's right up there, you know. So having done that on a whim, probably not the best idea for me, given the state that I was in, physically, mentally, emotionally, but I'm like, I've done crazy shit. Enough with Paul and Wes, I at least know the chances are low that I'm going to die. Other than that, all bets are off, but I can assume that whatever horrible thing happens, Paul and Wes are going to make sure that I'm not dead and I actually come back home. I'm not sure in how many pieces, but I'll make it back home, right? So it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be, but I very distinctly remember our descent. The Ascent was a piece of cake, compared to going back down, especially for me, because it's 1000s upon 1000s upon 1000s of Rocky Steps, and our time management not the best. So it was pitch black, and I was dealing with a horrible knee situation, where on the way down, basically with every single step, was literally like a knife was going into my kneecap, all right? And all of us had our packs, and Polly's like, just give me your pack. So for like, the last third of it, you're carrying two backpacks. There was no complaints. It was just like, yeah, man, of course, why wouldn't I? Right? So you're carrying two packs instead of one, just so my knee didn't explode on the way down. So that, to me, is like, that's that. That's the demonstration of you practicing what you preach. So just wanted to put it on the record that I was very appreciative for that. But the second time we're going that shit ain't happening again. I'm ready this time,

Paul Beckman

there we go. We're prepped and ready. I love that exactly. All right. So go ahead. Go ahead.

Zack Arnold

No, you go ahead. Please. The

Paul Beckman

idea that, like Wes and Paul are. Comment, I probably won't die like Wesley, you know, Paul, okay, we're gonna be okay. We'll get into some crazy stuff. I love it.

Zack Arnold

Yeah, like I said, all of my best stories start with this one time with Wes and Paul. Other than that, my life is pretty boring and predictable, and I kind of like it that way. But every once in a while I need that unpredictability, because I need to, just like you've been talking about, I have to put myself in situations where I can learn how to modulate that fear, not that I'm fearless. It's just, how do I increase that courage a little bit and do that scary shit that I'm, you know, not usually accustomed to doing? So having said that, kind of want to start to wrap things up, and I don't always do this at the end of my conversations, but I think in this case, it would be fitting I'd like to play a little game of time travel. So what I would like you to do, rather than giving advice to our listeners and our viewers, today, I want you to travel back in time to that night when you were in the middle of chemotherapy, that Saturday evening where you wanted to call your mom, and I just want my mom, but I've already done that, and I just have to sit in the suffering. What advice do you give to Paul in that moment?

Paul Beckman

Bro, you got this. You got this, too shall pass. Mm, hmm, you know, like, it's easy from here on out, it's like this. If this is as bad as it gets, this ain't so bad, you know. But the just, just the knowledge that, like, you know, I'm on the other side and better for it.

Zack Arnold

Well, I think this too shall pass could be very good advice for just about anybody that's living through the shit storm of a dumpster fire, of an uncertain nightmare that many of us are navigating at the moment. So, yeah, yeah,

Paul Beckman

it'll pass, you know, like, moment. Like, all we have is the moment and and the just like the breath. And that's like, I can I can breathe one more time. I can have one more moment. I can have one more moment, you know, and like, that's all I have to get through. And it'll pass. Man, it'll, it'll, it'll pass. And on the other man, on the other side of fear is everything you want, baby.

Zack Arnold

Well, you're, you're certainly proof of that. And I'm very, very excited to see where your story goes next, because we're in the early chapters of Paul Beckman, and I'm still confident that eventually you will be the Paul Beckman. So I'm excited to see when all that comes together. In the meantime, for anybody that might be listening or watching that's super excited to connect with you, learn more about you or otherwise, where do you want to send people

Paul Beckman

today? Ooh, you can catch me on Instagram @polybpositive, also my blood type. Thank you very much. I've got a fitness page, polybfitness. I've got a YouTube page, pbproductionss with 2s at the end. Yeah. Just be on the lookout. I'm at Groundlings here and there. I do some stand up here and there, but I'll post that all on my on my social media pages there and yeah, just get ready. I'm coming. I'll be out there. I want to be in your I want to be in your spaces, hopefully drowning out some other noises that we don't like and replacing it with something more fun and more me.

Zack Arnold

Well, I don't think the world is quite ready or prepared for Paul Beckman, but I'm excited for when that time comes. So me too, on that note, man, this was this was so much worth the wait. I can't even, not even sure how to, how to really express that, because we've been talking about this back and forth, off and on. Life gets in the way. Other shit gets in the way. But I'm glad we finally had this conversation on the record so we can share your craziness and your positivity with the world. So can't thank you enough for being here my friend, dude,

Paul Beckman

Zack, I can't thank you for enough for thinking of me and always sticking around and allowing me in on your crazy adventures. And dude, this everything that you do is is dope, man, and putting out some good into the world, and the people you interact with are really, really cool. So I'm honored to be in that mix and excited to be at the first step of this new segue into new podcasting, new new discussions. Thank you, man, thank you very much.

Zack Arnold

You're more than welcome, and I'm honored to have you.

Paul Beckman

Awesome. All right. Well, we'll be seeing each other soon.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai